were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Randomize
