You're a womanizer and a bitch.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
