I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
