I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
