My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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