I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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