she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
