I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
