So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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