i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
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