he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
is it fun? or sober?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
