Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
