Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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