I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
