Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
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