Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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