Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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