It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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