Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
