what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize