Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Randomize
