People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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