it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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