i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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