please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
