Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize