i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
