i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
