Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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