WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
