If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
