direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
