As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
