Well douche your snatch and let's go!
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
is wine microwaveable?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
