Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
i've created a new STD.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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