once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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