Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Randomize
