Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
