Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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