I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Randomize
