It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Randomize
