We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
