This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
MIDGETS
????
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
