hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
