We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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