There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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