Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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