she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
