May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
