it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
